(Perry and Fatty read a poster)
10 guilders reward for anybody who saves a person from drowning near this pier! The beach committee.
Gee, that gives me an idea to earn some easy money!
But surely we cannot wait here until somebody falls into the water.
We don’t have to. Listen … you jump into the drink, and pretend you are drowning. I will jump after you, save you, and those ten guilders will be ours.
Gee, that is clever!
(A little later)
Stay calm, I will save you!
(Jumps into the water)
That boy is a hero.
What a brave fellow.
(After the rescue)
Young man, that was a remarkable deed! May I hand you these 10 guilders as a reward?!
(A little later, on the pier)
Oh, the bank note blew out of my hand!
Wait, I will dive in the water to get it back.
Grrrr, you dirty rascals.
(Perry and Fatty are being chased by the life guard)
I don’t understand why he is so excited, did he not get his money back?!
Your honour, there is the man who killed Babs.
That man must hang. How did he do it?
He cut her into small pieces and salted her.
That was wrong of him. He must hang.
Your honour, I did not kill Babs! I fed her, and clothed her, and I have taken care of her. There are witnesses who will testify that I am a good man, and not a murderer.
Man, you must hang! You enlarge your crime by your vanity. It does not befit somebody who … is accused of something to pretend he is a good man.
But your honour, there are witnesses who will confirm it. And since I now stand accused of murder…
You must hang! You cut up Babs, salted her, and you are vain … three capital crimes! Who are you, little lady?
I am Babs.
Thank the Lord. Your honour, you can see that I did not kill her!
Hm … yes … so! But the salting?
No your honour, he did not salt me. To the contrary, he has done me many good deeds. He is a noble person!
Listen, your honour, she calls me a good person.
Hm … so the third item still stands. Bailiff, take that man away, he must hang. He is guilty of arrogance. Court reporter, cite in the premises the jurisprudence of Lessing’s patriarch.
The story “Sample” was printed at the back of a comic book about the Dutch version of Perry Winkle, Sjors. It was presumably written by Frans PiÃ«t (and copyright by the estate of PiÃ«t?).
The story “Unpublished play” is one of the introductions to Multatuli’s Max Havelaar.
The reason I put them together is mostly for stylistic similarities. Both are dialogues, both are in a way fremdkÃ¶rper for the works they were published in. Spot any other similarities? Mention them in the comments.